Negative Thoughts and Their Impact on Reality

Have you ever noticed how a single negative thought can snowball into a series of unfortunate events? Many individuals, who we might call 'Armageddon' types, are prone to believing that every bad thing that happens is a sign that everything will end in disaster. This pattern can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, leading to a life filled with unnecessary stress and negativity.

Understanding the 'Armageddon' Mindset

The 'Armageddon' person sees the worst in every situation. For example, if someone loses a job, they might instantly think, 'If I lose this job, I will never get another,' and this belief becomes a self-fulfilling conviction. Alternatively, they might refuse to travel abroad or go on holiday, convinced that any number of potential disasters could happen.

This kind of mindset is based on imagined outcomes that may or may not come true. However, by starting off with a negative mindset, the person increases the likelihood of experiencing a negative outcome. Sometimes, people even create their own failures because they believe that only failure is possible, leading to a vicious cycle of negativity and fear.

The 'Island' Fallacy

Another common negative belief is the 'island' mentality, which makes individuals feel like they are entirely responsible for both their successes and failures. If other people succeed, it feels like a personal failure. This mindset can lead to decreased self-worth and constant comparisons to others, which can be extremely stressful.

For instance, if nine people you know are not high flyers but the tenth one is, you might attribute the success of the tenth person to their efforts while feeling like a failure for not being as successful. This type of thinking not only erodes self-esteem but also makes it difficult to enjoy any successes.

The Lies of Control and Uncontrolled Life

Feeling in control or out of control can both trigger negative thoughts. On one hand, when you feel like you cannot control your life, you might always be negative. On the other, if you believe you are in control, you might become defensive, always prepared to protect what you have.

People who fall into this category often use their level of control to justify their fears and can't grow because they are constantly struggling with an often non-existent entity of control. This rigid mentality prevents the development of flexibility and openness to new ideas.

Attachment to Feelings and Self-Worth

Connecting your self-worth to your feelings can be dangerous. People often judge their happiness, sadness, anger, or fear as indicators of their overall worth. However, these emotions are momentary and do not define a person's long-term value. If you feel worthless because you feel sad one day, or overly successful because you feel happy, you will always live on a seesaw of happiness and unhappiness.

For example, if someone says, "Her cooking is the best I've ever known," the person may feel overly happy, but if the same person says, "It doesn't really matter to me," the individual might feel upset. This shows how sensitive your self-worth can be based on fleeting emotions.

Blame and Negative Self-Perception

Some people blame others or themselves for everything. Those who blame others are often critical and defensive, while those who blame themselves can become even more negative. Inflexibility in opinions and thinking can lead to negativity, as people find it hard to achieve anything when others are not doing things their way.

Using phrases like "I should not be negative" can set you up for failure. Embracing a positive mindset should not be a requirement but a goal to work towards each day. Instead of saying what you should be, try to be positive and flexible in your thoughts and actions.

Breaking the Negative Thought Cycle

The biggest obstacle to positive thinking is habit. Habits, while useful for efficiency, can become destructive if they become too ingrained. To break the cycle of negative thoughts:

Always look at the whole situation, not just the parts (avoid tunnel vision). Use a scale rather than yes-no, on-off, black-white, do-don’t. Avoid making definitive statements like "I will never" or "I will always" (these are absolute terms). Do not assume you know what others are thinking (avoid mind-reading). Avoid predicting catastrophic outcomes (don't be an Armageddon merchant). Avoid taking things personally. Drop all "should." Stop blaming yourself and others (try to find deeper reasons for any problems).

In conclusion, negative thoughts can indeed attract negative circumstances, but by becoming more aware of these patterns and actively working to change them, you can begin to shift your mindset towards a more positive and fulfilling life.