What Annoys Current PhD Students the Most from Prospective Students?

Prospective PhD students often make comments that can be quite distressing for those already embroiled in the PhD journey. These comments can range from overconfidence about future employment to a lack of understanding of the rigorous nature of the PhD program. This article delves into the most annoying things prospective PhD students say to current PhD students, drawing from firsthand experiences and the collective wisdom of those currently navigating the challenging path of doctoral studies.

1. An Overly Optimistic Timeline

A recurring complaint is the comment, 'I’m going to get my PhD in 4–5 years from now! Then I’m going to get a great job of 100K or above right after!'

This statement can feel intrusive as timelines can be complicated and personal. Current PhD students often find themselves struggling to even predict their own timelines accurately. For example, someone who used to say this out of overconfidence found themselves making many enemies among current PhD students. 'When you later on in their shoes, and experience what they go through, it’s like, "Dream On Bruh! Cuz it ain’t gonna happen,"' one current PhD student recalls. This attitude can come off as dismissive of the challenges and realities of pursuing a PhD.

2. Arrogance and Self-Importance

Another sore point is comments that come off as pretentious or overly confident. One such example is, 'Yay! I passed my first Oral Comprehensive Exam!!!'

Current PhD students often feel the need to maintain high levels of perseverance and humility. A response like, 'Stop being an Arrogant Show Off You Narcissist,' can be quite jarring. It is important to recognize the struggles and growth that comes with passing significant milestones in the PhD journey.

3. Overdramatization of Stress

'This PhD Program is Stressing Me Out!!!' can also be a common complaint from prospective students. While this may be a valid feeling for anyone, current PhD students often face a level of stress that goes beyond the norm. Their response, 'Bah! That’s nothing. Wait until you reach ABD Status. So Stop Whining like a Crybaby you Wuss,' highlights the unique pressures of the dissertation phase. This response can feel dismissive, ignoring the significant challenges faced when the stakes are highest.

4. Abandonment and Reluctance to Seek Help

'Please Help Me I Can’t Deal with this PhD Program anymore!' can be a moment of vulnerability, but the response, 'Fuck Off! I have my own Problems I need to deal with!,' can be quite harsh. It reflects the intense pressure current PhD students feel to manage their own struggles, often leading to a sense of isolation and reluctance to seek help when needed.

5. Boundary Violations and Misconduct

'For my Dissertation Defense, I’m gonna be inviting lots of Sexy Undergrad Students whom I interacted with in my Teaching Lab Course to come to support me on my defense after that HOUSE PARTY to CELEBRATE MY VICTORY followed by a Graduation Party!' can be a serious concern for current PhD students.

Such comments can raise concerns about boundary violations and potential misconduct. The response, 'Oy Vey… A Sex Predator… Time to report him to the Title IX Dean,' underscores the need for a safe and respectful environment. Ph.D. programs should foster an atmosphere of mutual respect and support, rather than exploitation.

Conclusion

The experiences shared by current PhD students illustrate that while prospective students can be well-intentioned, their comments can inadvertently create tension and misunderstanding. It is crucial for prospective students to gain a deeper understanding of the intricacies and challenges of the Ph.D. journey before making such comments. Current PhD students would appreciate more empathy and a willingness to take a step back and understand the complexity of their journey.